21 weeks. 21 weeks along and not in a rush, because I know that VERY important things are happening to our little babe right now to prepare him or her for life in this world. I love that fact. But the more I know is developing, and the more I can imagine the little one tucked inside me, the more I grow in expectant anticipation. I suddenly understand quite fully why we refer to this season as a time of “expecting.”
Sometimes, I just want to meet this kiddo, and tonight is one of those nights. I am absolutely, positively enjoying every bit of this experience of being pregnant for the first time, but occasionally it delights me so greatly that I can hardly bear to wait another 19 weeks to meet the tiny one who’s already responsible for so much joy.
Christmas is a perfect season for this feeling to be welling up in me. There is already an anticipation so apparent in each day as we count towards Christmas and the celebration of the birth of the Christ child. Tonight, I joined a 200+ person choir, over 60 musicians, Avalon and a completely packed sanctuary to worship the baby King. There were moments that seemed so contemplative and introspective–where I almost felt alone with our amazing God and this little baby and my thoughts, and not surrounded by several thousand people. And then there were times of worship where joy built up so intensely in my spirit that I could hardly manage to keep from crying and shouting and dancing all at once on the stage. Peace, amazement and delight felt like gigantic exclamation points in those moments, as I reflected on the gift that God has given this world…and the very tangible gift that He is giving to us as a family right now.
My belly is starting to show more obviously these days, but I still can’t help the desire to nearly shout the good news to people I’ve not seen in a long time. I’m just so overwhelmed with the JOY of it all that I want to share it with everyone! What an amazing likeness to the way that I feel about the good news of Christ and what His being born means for this world and everyone in it. It truly does evoke the same kind of emotion in my spirit–one that remains un-quenched no matter how many times I can share the news. And God has afforded us so many opportunities around the world to bring that news to others–in Australia, South Africa, Swaziland, Mozambique, Egypt, India and beyond, that I sometimes forget just how good it feels to share the same news with people in your own backyard. There was a special sweetness to tonight as we all sang together, “Gloria! In Excelsis Deo!…”Good news, good news! An angel brings good news…He is light! He is love! He is grace! Born on Christmas Day!”
It’s true that the anticipation of Christ is one of the most wonderful feelings I’ve ever experienced. Now, with this little babe dancing in my belly as I sing aloud to share the greatest “Good News,” is it even more wonderful. I will never forget this Christmas season–the first where I can, in the fullest way, contemplate the meaning of expectation. I am soaking in every hour, every kick and movement, every peaceful thought, and every joy that comes in knowing a baby awaits.