Well, “weekend time” continues, and I couldn’t be more grateful for an extra day home as a family. Weekends never feel quite long enough, and tomorrow will be a beautiful bonus! We attended an absolutely lovely wedding tonight, and while the party is still going strong as I type, we had to get the munchkin home to bed. He cried and put on his best pouty lip as we left the party, lamenting, “I don’t want to leave the wedding!” I didn’t either…it was a grand celebration! More on the delightful details tomorrow…
Tonight, as I come to terms again with my limitations as a mama with a growing belly (gardening yesterday, dancing while holding H tonight, and in general, trying to keep up with the active demands of a toddler), I just want to focus on the beauty of this season. I do feel more limited, certainly, and I hate telling Henry no sometimes now when he wants me to pick him up, but I am also so taken by the gift of being pregnant, and I desperately desire to glorify God in all of my efforts to carry and love this blooming baby. These days, I have so many incredible mama friends who are raising toddlers and toting newborns, or who are raising toddlers and growing soon-t0-be newborns. It’s an awe-inspiring stage of life. And at times it’s overwhelming, too (although mostly in a good way :). So I’m feeling compelled to offer up a prayer. For all of the mamas who are coming to terms with their own motherhood tonight–in whatever way it applies. Some will be up in the wee hours nursing or cuddling a newborn. Others will be tossing and turning while they navigate growing bellies and changing bodies. Some will be wishing they could hold babies closer while their little ones are far away tonight, and still some will be praying for a baby of their own and clinging to hope for the future. Whatever the case may be, I know that God sees each one of us, and He hears our requests. He plans out His timing and knows what we can handle and all that we need. And he meets us right where we are. His promises are full and generous to our mama hearts…
Father, thank you for another day where you have sustained me and allowed me the gift of carrying this precious life within. Thank you for the blessing of sweet (although often painful:) kicks and constant movement. Thank you that you have created my body to be capable of this amazing miracle!
Thank you, too, God, for using my past experience and my great, deep desire and pain to remind me why this is a most sacred season. Thank you for never letting our hurts go to waste, and for covering me in your love and peace. Your timing is perfect, God, and you knew that I would be carrying this wee one today–in this time and place, for your plans to be fulfilled for this blessing of a baby when he or she is born. Please help me to follow your lead, God, and together as a family, please help us to raise this life to know and love and serve you.
As the day winds down, Father, there are physical reminders of why I can’t do this without your help. Things ache and stretch and require more energy, and I don’t have all of the answers for how to do this on my own. Henry is a busy little person–but you knew that he would be when you entrusted him to us. If I am going to keep up and be engaged and love him in the ways he so desires to be loved right now, I know I need to lean on you for help. Please show me how to love him best, and please help me to fully embrace even the hard parts of carrying this baby as the months roll on. Please give me a spirit of grace and joy and patience toward my children, my family. I can’t do it alone, but I can with You.
Father, as mamas, we all deal with things in the day to day that make our hearts heavy or tired. Sometimes the weight of our burdens is light, but sometimes it can be so very heavy. No matter the weight tonight, would you please guide me–and all of the amazing mamas in my life–to your peace, regardless of the circumstance. Would you wrap your arms especially tightly around those we know who are experiencing deep pain and loss? Will you meet them where they are and display your presence in unmistakable ways?
God, I love you, and I’m so incredibly grateful that you have entrusted little, impressionable lives to my care. Being a mama is the most humbling and amazing gift, and I can’t believe how much more I’ve learned about you as I’ve tried to be attentive to this call on my life. I pray that I will glorify you in the process. Thank you for loving me enough to trust me with your creation.
more of you, and less of me…especially when there’s increasingly more of me these days, and i need so much to trust in your presence and care. love,