henry david, 28 april 2012.

When I started brainstorming party themes the day after Henry was born (kidding!), landing on Eric Carle’s Very Hungry Caterpillar was kind of a no-brainer. H has been my “bug” from day one, and since being introduced to table food, he just keeps eating right on through everything we put in front of him. (His appetite is marvelous, and his mama, appreciative:) My love of butterflies and the deliciously sunny sunshine in Carle’s book didn’t hurt either–it was the perfect inspiration for Henry’s big day. I commissioned a friend/graphic designer to help create my vision for an invite, and once we had guests on a list, the ball was rolling:

h’s party invite, fixed to chipboard to feel like a page out of the book. corners rounded and cake hole drilled by a local print shop for the finishing touch. these turned out just as i had hoped!

From there, I threw myself into party planning mode–something I absolutely love and long for an excuse to do! On the to do list? Cake, balloons, food/drinks, favors, kids’ games, decorations, and DIYs. I should start by saying that Pinterest and Etsy are brilliant creations, and that they make the process all that much more fun. I browsed and perused to my heart’s content and came up with some originals that made me oh so happy. The cake seemed like a sensible place to begin, so I met with my friend Katie from Second Floor Bakery to dream up these lovelies:

i just had to incorporate the sunshine for henry’s smash cake, and i wanted both cakes to have a homemade, organic kind of feel, so we went with simple swirly buttercream on the outside–a dark “muddy” chocolate for the main cake and a vanilla buttercream for the birthday boy.

I loved the idea of a cake bunting, so I came up my own version to represent the caterpillar from the book. It was fun making the petite bunting out of paper after my fabric bunting shenanigans (read on:) earlier in the week.

very hungry caterpillar cake bunting and gerbera daisies. delightful!

The cakes were splendid on the outside, and equally as marvelous to bite into. I always end up with a little leftover cake from SFB because their portions are so generous, but this time, we actually ran out! No one could resist the chocolate truffle cake with the strawberry filling–and why should they? It was just too good!

For food, I decided to stick with what works and let the book dictate the menu. I didn’t want to get too terribly fancy because everything needed to be kiddo friendly, so I filled the table with all kinds of bright, ripe fruits, a big green salad (one nice green leaf:), cheese and crackers, pickles, chips and salsa, and a caterpillar-ish looking pasta salad. I ordered lemon bars from Second Floor to add a little more “sweet” to the mix, and Jason grilled (awesome) hot dogs for our guests:

on saturday, he ate through…a smorgasbord of treats.

After browsing a number of different printables for food labels for the table, I opted to get creative with a deck of VHC playing cards. I cut out little food shapes from the corresponding cards, used a mini hole punch for the “bites,” and then just hand wrote the labels on card stock table tents. I love how they turned out:

four strawberries!

For space and flow, I set up a separate area for beverages and table ware. The bay window was an ideal spot:

i searched high and low for beverage dispensers i could love (and not just live with). imagine my delight when i discovered these mason jar look-a-likes from world market, plus red, green, and yellow striped paper straws, giant polka dots for ice cubes, and polka dot/striped paper goods. bliss!

I also couldn’t resist a giant tub filled with these:

henry weinhard’s old fashioned sodas, which i neglected to grab a photo of that day. they were just too much to resist, what with the name and all. (photo cred. to Tri-Elite Mktg.)

When it came time to decorate, I couldn’t help but get a little carried away in the DIY project arena. What better excuse than your child’s 1st birthday party to learn how to make a fabric bunting (or three!):

i wanted to make a bunting i could use for the wall above henry’s crib once the party was over, so my color choices were more long term than VHC. there are three total–one for each main doorway and a third for the bay window.

love these fabrics! tutorial to follow soon…

Then I decided I had better take a stab at a party hat to match:

one!

Just a bunting and a party hat, then? As luck would have it, my incredibly talented aunt had hand-painted a heap of Eric Carle characters for an anniversary celebration at the library where she works, and after mentioning our Very Hungry Caterpillar theme a while back, a tube of beautifully artistic bugs arrived on our doorstep. We absolutely had to put the caterpillar and sunshine to use! They were the perfect addition to the party, brightening up the wall above the kids’ play area:

isn’t he something? too cute!

you are my sunshine…

some serious talent–and a seriously fun party decoration! thank you, aunt carol!!

Last but not least on the decorating front, I wanted to pay tribute to beauty of the past twelve months and how much Henry has grown. I gathered up a smattering of my favorite HD moments caught on camera, and plastered the front entryway door with a collage of our little bug:

And then there were favors…

homemade bug jars and (not so homemade) pinwheels for our wee guests. bug jar tutorial coming soon!

every kid needs a bug jar for the summer time!

I had all kinds of fun games and crafts planned for the kids if time and weather permitted, but when we woke up that morning, it looked like this outside:

rainy and 47 degrees for hd’s big day.

So we scrapped the outdoor picnic plans and put the bubbles and caterpillar buckets away for a sunny day. We had so much fun indoors, in fact, that we didn’t even take the time to make these:

a caterpillar bookmark craft for another rainy day, i think!

Hank didn’t seem to notice the weather, and our friends and family were the most gracious of guests as we all spent a few hours in close quarters to celebrate Henry with the utmost enthusiasm. Everyone wrote special messages to the birthday boy in his new copy of the Very Hungry Caterpillar–a perfect memento for a perfect day:

“please leave a note for our bug…”

And when it came time to sing “Happy Birthday” and dive into cake, the guest of honor did a marvelous job of discovering all of the chocolatey goodness to be had beneath layers of sugary frosting:

We wrapped up the afternoon with friends and grandparents and our little wonder–all freshly cleaned up and ready for a nap:

so blessed to be so surrounded…

A few weeks out from H’s birthday bash, I think we’re still in awe of God’s faithfulness to us and of all of the reminders we were given that day. Henry’s first year of life bubbled over with such joy and goodness, and we couldn’t be more blessed as his mom and dad! It was a most perfect day in many ways–an adequate celebration to express what great delight we take in raising our little bug and watching him grow!

ahhh, wonder!

our birthday JOY!

tired birthday boy and his happy mama.

For me, this time around, the love was in the details and everything they intended to celebrate. Happy 1st Birthday, once more, Henry David. you make my heart sing!

love. and a nice green leaf.

mm

This is what 1st birthday parties are made of. Well, this and a whole bunch of other stuff. Stuff forthcoming…

so glad i wasn’t in charge of the bath that day (thanks, mom!),

mm

If I’m being honest, these past few weeks have just lent themselves more to journaling between the pages of my favorite moleskine than plodding out the components of my days for the blogosphere at large. Maybe someday, but not right now.

So this is just to say that I’m still here, and still wanting to pour myself into things like blogging and sharing and loving life publicly, in the hopes of spurring on others to love life a little more, too.

The beautiful thing about this time of quiet is that I am stacking up 1,001 ideas to share with you at a later juncture. All kinds of things, really, from recipes to outings to party ideas to mama revelations. At the moment, they’re all swirling like a collection of Pinterest boards, cut up into confetti and shaken in a snow globe. I can only hope the result will be as pretty at some point. :)

Rest assured (although it’s been longer than I’d normally like to turn around a report back) that homemade buntings are still hanging about in doorways throughout the house, paper straws still fancy up the china cabinet, and a gigantic, hand-painted Eric Carle scene still graces the living room wall in remembrance of Henry’s 1st birthday bash. We cleaned up all of the cake, but some of the party just had to keep going on a bit longer. Besides, who doesn’t love festive fabric flags coloring up the house in the Springtime?!

A few mini tutorials, lots of photos, and my recap of select favorite moments from the day coming soon…perhaps even before the weekend is out! I can’t stay quiet forever…just for a tad bit more of some much needed time.

love from my corner of the universe,

mm

I do hope that you felt celebrated today, even though the big event in honor of this milestone won’t be here for a few more days. Then, I’ll be so tickled to watch as you take delight in all of the kiddos running around the house, the decorations here and there, the sugary sweet cake set before you for all kinds of smashing and eating up. I know you’re not going to remember it later, but we will all be celebrating YOU. Beyond that, we’ll be honoring a most remarkable year–the way that you’ve changed all of our hearts and how it’s truly taken a village to raise you since day one. Sure, dad and I have done a lot of the heavy lifting ;), but the people who are coming (traveling, even) to see you on Saturday have all been a hugely important part of your life and who you’re becoming. We are SO grateful, we couldn’t even describe it if we tried.

Today on Facebook (is it still around as you read this, however many years later?), nearly 100 people took the time to tell your daddy and I that you are loved, and to wish you a happy birthday or to add their cheer to the day. You have only been on this earth for 12 months, HD, but you are so, so, so, so loved. I think about that and I look at today and I am just blown away. If people love you that much, and we as your parents love you even more, then how incredibly much must God love you!?! I know that today brings Him great delight, as it does me–to see you thriving and joyful and healthy and growing so beautifully before our eyes.

I want you to know that when I sat down to write to you tonight, I knew it would never be possible to articulate all that I want to say to you about this past year–especially in one blog entry. Suffice it to say that I am overwhelmed by all that you add to my world. Hopefully, if you look back on the past year of my entries to you, you’ll know a little something about just what an impact you’ve had on me. I think sometimes we underestimate the power of a young person, but I would have to be crazy to deny the ways that God has used you to change the world in one year’s time. I would grasp every moment all over again if I could.

Henry, to date you are a resilient, determined, peaceful, friendly, intuitive, sensitive, social, careful-but-adventurous, worshipful, cuddly, radiant, gentle, and inquisitive little being. You are learning at lightening speed (which is normal for your age, but still captivates me all the time:). You have a soft and good heart. You electrify a room. You are magnetic wherever we go.

And as far as other things go? Your third tooth made its appearance yesterday–the top middle left of the bunch, and just a tiny, glimmering white sliver, but it’s there. no matter that you only have two whole teeth at your disposal at mealtimes; you eat everything we give you as if you haven’t seen food in a week. (Don’t worry, you’ve never missed a meal;) You are still crawling speedily wherever you want to go, or cruising at a scary pace along all furniture, walls, doors, and the like. You aren’t quite ready to walk yet, but so close! Another few weeks, and you’ll be terribly hard to catch, I’m certain. You love to drop things and see what happens. You chase after the dog with reckless abandon (he runs away for now, but I’m sure that will change.) You almost always have a matchbox car or something with wheels in your hand. You still LOVE to read more than most other activities, which brings me joy. Your introspection is curious at this age, and I watch you closely to try and determine what’s going on as you process (no luck yet, but it’s still fun). You like your sleep, but you also embrace the day. You get excited about the words “car,” “milk,” “Kruger,” “Daddy,” “Mommy,” “hungry,” and “go,” among others. But if I’m being totally honest, “car” probably outweighs the rest 10:1. You are a boy after your daddy’s heart.

As your mama, I am so humbled to watch you as you grow, realizing on a regular basis that I am responsible for you, what you learn, how you begin to understand the world. It’s no small task, and one I do not take the least bit lightly. You are just as much a gift as you are a responsibility, and I rarely ever mind to meet your needs. You have taught me a lifetime about self-sacrifice and joyful servanthood. How can I ever thank you enough?

So, Little Man-er, this is really it. The start of your second year and a landmark anniversary of the very best day of our lives. I love you an indescribable amount. The Lord bless you and keep you, Henry David. The Lord lift his countenance upon you. The Lord make his face to shine upon you and give you peace, precious one. Happy, Happy Birthday!

all the love in the world,

your mama

I still beam with joy when people remark what a sweet boy you are. They don’t even have to know you, or to see you for more than a few minutes, to know it’s true. You just have something about you that makes me take a step back in awe and wonder. I know, you’re mine. And that helps ;) But really, God gave us a tiny miracle in you. Don’t ever forget that we feel that way, ok?

For now, I’m off to work on more birthday party preparations and to eventually (shhh, don’t tell!) wrap a few presents for you to open tomorrow (and maybe a few more for the weekend;) I can’t wait to celebrate you with people we love this Saturday. An entire year of life with you in it has been the very best thing. So here we go, sweet baby. Two…

more than you’ll ever know,

mommy

Henry David, I want you to know that as your first birthday rounds the corner, you are being celebrated in a BIG way (and not just because your mama loves to throw a party…although I do!) There’s all kinds of pomp and circumstance in little and big things headed your way, and I hope that you’ll feel all kinds of loved and adored on this, your birthday week (of course, I hope you always do). We’re in the home stretch now, buddy. I’m counting down until the clock strikes Wednesday, April 25, and then we’re going to shout from the rooftops just how amazing we think you are and how vastly you’ve changed our lives in just a year’s time. Heck, I’d shout it from the rooftops any old day of the week, but on Wednesday, I have the. most. perfect. excuse. You, sweet boy, are going to be ONE!

So here’s the start of the formal countdown to your big day and all of the celebrating that will ensue. THREE…

oh how i love you, love you, love you,

mommy

“So what’s the story?” you ask. In Robin Good and His Not-So-Merry Men, Robin Good and crew set out in the town of Bethlingham to help the poor by fundraising from the rich. All is well until the Sheriff of Bethlingham, by order of the greedy (and hungry) Prince John, halts the merry men’s efforts and gathers the ham they’ve worked so hard to fund. Without anything to show for their hard work, the merry men go rogue, leaving Robin Good on his own, and setting out to steal from the rich instead. Things don’t go so well for the suddenly Not-So-Merry men when Prince John’s guards capture them for stealing hams within Bethlingham’s walls. All the while, Robin Good is left to his own devices as he tries to bargain with the Prince on the poor’s behalf. Alone and frustrated after his friends have deserted him, Robin Good learns the important lesson that no hurt is too big for God. He puts his new understanding to good use as he sets out to rescue his friends and to restore hope to the town of Bethlingham once and for all.

In light of the plethora of challenging material we encounter in the media daily, Veggie Tales has forged on in the world of children’s entertainment to provide–not only appropriate and encouraging material, but quality stories and well-crafted characters that will delight the whole family. Robin Good and His Not-So-Merry men is no exception. As a bonus to an already great show, Jason and I thoroughly enjoyed the included short, “Lenny and the Lost Birthday,” featuring Junior Asparagus:) Just when it seems as though everyone has forgotten his special day, Lenny learns an important lesson about Leap Year and how the calendar changes once every four years.

Robin Good and His Not-So-Merry Men is now available for purchase in stores and online here, as well as on Amazon. If you’re in the mood for something to brighten up the DVD player, all the while encouraging your children to understand more clearly how God loves and cares for their every hurt, this would make a great purchase!

happy viewing,

mm

*Disclosure: Big Idea Entertainment did supply me with a copy of this DVD in exchange for my review. I was not compensated in any other way. All opinions stated here are my own. Cheers!

For the most part, I’m motivated by tasks and the prospect of crossing them off. As someone with a perfectionist-type personality, nothing feels better than seeing the check marks down the line or crumpling up a completed list to toss in the trash. When I’ve crossed something off, it’s only because it’s completely finished–no half-done chores for this girl. That is, up until a year or so ago. It only took me the better part of 28 years on this earth and several years in the workforce to figure out how to best manage my time, to “multitask” (if that’s truly possible), and to plot out a course of action that would leave me satisfied with my movement forward at the end of the day.

Enter mommyhood.

Not even just mommyhood, if I’m being realistic, but pregnancy and being a vessel for a tiny human being…then growing into a blimpish sort of shape that only felt more and more surreal until…experiencing the most physically challenging feat of my life (though I loved it!) and then suddenly becoming a parent (to a tiny and loud and needy little person who demanded all of my attention at every hour of every day for a good number of months). And then there was the whole part about being overjoyed and overwhelmed by nearly every nuance life had to offer for a while, until things started to adjust back to a new normal–you know, the one where work was suddenly home and home was suddenly work and I never had to put on makeup or nice clothes if I didn’t want to (but I wanted to!), because there was really nowhere I needed to go. Then, living room walls and time cuddled on the couch with our precious bundle started to close in on me a little bit, because they were mostly all I saw and did for those first few weeks (months) as a new mom and THAT was overwhelming in a different way.

Did I even keep lists at this point? I’m trying to remember. And yet I recall so very little. Thank goodness I blogged so much in the wee hours then :)

So where does that leave me now, this much further on down the road? With an amazing almost-one year old, a life that has settled into itself (in some ways) over the past number of months, and a bajillion lists that I’m trying to cross off and accomplish and achieve because I feel so much like myself again after all this time and this is what I do. Or is it?

Turns out, life right now isn’t nearly as much about lists and all as it is about being present in the moment, about being “mama” when Henry needs me, about being a wife who can listen and a homemaker who manages to keep things mostly tidy (but sometimes, not as much as I’d like). There are one hundred and one to-do’s in my head as I write this, and none of them are on paper. I’m trying to admit to myself that writing them down would be a little easier (because my memory is not 100% of what it was pre-munchkin), but in my mind, writing them down commits me to them–and that’s a whole different stress altogether.

My grand conclusion? I continue to need to work on my ability to be ok with GOOD ENOUGH. For me–and perhaps some of you, it’s an art that I’m nowhere near perfecting. Good enough feels like settling…because it is. But settling, when it brings peace or calm or less heartburn, is actually a good thing, right? I’m just still working on embracing that fact.

Someone is having a birthday next week, and with it, I’m feeling the need/responsibility/burning desire to celebrate him in the grandest way possible, as any mama does when her baby turns one. No doubt it will be a day surrounded by people who love him and who can hardly believe a year has gone by because they’ve watched him change and grow right alongside me. And certainly, the party we’re throwing will be full of fun things and cake and good food and such, but the details in between might just have to be…whatever they are by then. This admittance doesn’t mean I’ll be trying less over the next week to prepare, but it does mean that I’ll be making the effort to ease the stress that undoubtedly could accompany such an undertaking for someone like me.

I’ll be taking a few more deep breaths, that’s for sure. And working hard to keep the right amount of perspective in the mix as I go: Henry will only remember how we loved him in this season–not how perfect or imperfect the celebration of a certain birthday turned out to be.

Oh, the art of good enough. I’m chasing after you…just as soon as I jot you down on my list ;)

in practice,

mm

p.s. Stay tuned! Birthday details are underway, and this space is gonna fill up with them if I can help it!

I picked up the phone to call you today. Hank and I were on one of our sunny afternoon drives back from visiting with friends, and for just a moment, I thought about how you’d answer and we’d talk the rest of the way home. “And how’s Henry?” you would have asked me–remarking just how big he’s getting in all of his pictures and how much he looks like Jason more and more all the time. I’d tell you about Henry’s birthday party (“invite’s in the mail!”) and all the pomp and circumstance we’re planning for our little bug who’s nearly walking and talks all the day long.

Undoubtedly, we would have moved on to the weather next–how beautiful a Spring it’s been, and what a perfect day and temperature for this early on in April.  You’d fill me on family things, who’s traveling where and moving when, who’s expecting, had a baby, been sick, getting better. And I would laugh at the little things, all the while drinking in the time with you down to the very last drop–the “I love you, Gramma” and the “Love you, too, Sweetie,” and the click goodbye.

Everywhere I turn this week, it seems, you are there. Present in the tulips standing boldly in the sunshine, the robin perched on the fence through the kitchen window, the wafting scent of perfect Korean Spice blossoms, uncurling on every bush in the front yard. You’ve felt so close in moments, I could almost burst. And more than I wanted to imagine it–over the quiet moments when I’m left to think all alone, over the sweet spaces when I look at Henry or sit with Jason and recall the promises I made to you that I’d, “Be a good mom…Be a good wife,” I am overcome by your absence. In all of the beautiful things around me that you carefully taught me to love, the sting of missing you is suddenly so great…and I hope–in a good way, that somehow you know. I hope now you can see the indelible mark that you made on my heart over all those years.

Easter is only four days away, and as it arrives, I’m left to remember Easter afternoon last year–how we were talking on the phone when my labor with Henry began. How many beautiful days like that one have we taken to celebrate together as a family, always drawing near in the ways we could to be together? I’m so thankful we have so many to recount…I’m afraid I don’t know yet how to have them without you.

I keep trying to hold back the emotion that comes with great loss, as if there are rules about how we grieve and remember–how we carry on when a piece of ourselves feels broken off, washed away. I catch myself warding off tears and wondering why I’m trying so hard to swallow it down instead of letting it just come over me like a wave. I’m not perfect in any other way, so why would I attempt at being flawless in this? I know that you would understand and tell me it’s ok. You’d probably know before I ever got to you that something was the matter, have cookies and coffee waiting for me when I arrived so we could just talk. Just talk. We really knew how to do that, you and I. Didn’t we? Goodness, I miss you. I really, really do.

I’m so thankful for all of the reminders God is sending me along the way as time goes on–even if my breath catches when a butterfly lands and lingers nearby, or when the tears come unexpectedly as Henry and I dance around the living room. It’s a good thing, how many sweet instances bring me right back to who you were and what you loved and exactly what you meant to me. Thank you for all of the ways you always (and still do. See?!) brought me joy.

a bushel and a peck,

molly

Today you are 11 months old. Not quite a whole year, and a far cry from the babe we brought home last April 25th. You are changing so much, and still, some aspects of you become more and more obviously “Henry” every day. You have a whole arsenal of trademarks, HD–expressions galore that make us smile and wonder, remarkable car and truck noises, and a voracious appetite for books and anything with wheels.

This month, your curiosity is what strikes me the most as we turn the corner on the last leg of your very first year. You point at absolutely everything, then look either satisfied and delighted at knowing it’s name and purpose, or thoughtful and studious as you ask to see what object has grasped your attention. You furrow your little brow and turn as if to say, “What is it, Mom?!” at least a hundred times a day.

“Reading” and window watching are your top favorite activities, along with standing guard at your nursery gate. Nothing gets by you unless you are bone weary at the end of the day, and even then, I struggle to keep you from noticing every last sound and distraction as you have your last feeding before bedtime.

My child, you are strong. Physically strong and determined to get wherever you are going, and otherwise–as you seek your own answers, solutions, outcomes and consequences on a daily basis. I don’t worry much about you. I mean, as your mother, of course I worry–for your safety, your health, your heart, and your budding relationship with God. But I don’t worry about you. Even with only 11 months under our belts together, I am totally confident that you will be the one reminding me to keep it together some days. You’re sharp as a tack. I have no doubt I’ll be on my toes for the next number of years with you. And that’s a very good thing.

Perhaps it’s a first born thing, but you are one of the most calculating little ones I know. I can understand a little now why I’ve been teased a time or two about coming out of the womb a mini adult. You are a little boy, of course, and you like little boy things–sand, trucks, dogs, splashing with vigor in the bathtub. But you are cautious. From my vantage point, your little man wheels are spinning all day long and taking everything in. You turn pages of a book like it’s the most important task on earth. I cannot love you enough for this, or for how you study and take pause and study some more. Watching you is like learning an entirely new language and falling more in love with the culture behind it every day. As I get to know more of who you are becoming, I am increasingly aware of just how much I love being your mama. Proud doesn’t even cover it.

Between months 10 and 11, you have grown wildly independent. It’s only a matter of time before you are stepping–then running, everywhere you want to go. In the meantime, your two bottom teeth have finally made an appearance, shining up that gummy smile as if to say, “Here we are, world! What do you have for us!?” You have discovered your belly button (and mine, and daddy’s), and they perplex you in an adorable way. The Belly Button Book has helped us to hone in on your latest development–somehow, the “belly b’s” of cartoon hippos really clear up that mysterious little bump in the center of your tummy. You are also learning to tell us where your heart, hair, and ears are, adding to your repertoire of eyes, nose, mouth, and feet (but belly button is still by far my favorite–especially when you use both hands to tell me where it is ;). You’ve parked on the syllables ca-, da-, ma-, ba-, and ga- for a time, and you typically throw in some gibberish for good measure. And yet, every once in a while, you just get down to it and say the name of whatever it is you’d like to discuss. I love your little deep voice and how you get so serious when you have something important to say.

Now we’re counting down on birthday numero uno, and this mama is not yet ready to put a party hat on your head and admit that an entire year has gone by. Sometimes the days are long, yes, but the weeks and months disappear as if it were nothing. I love you as my toddler and I miss you as my infant all at the same time. No matter though, in the long run. You are still–as you’ve been from day one, my little bug. No walking, running, talking, chomping, pointing, or coming into your own will ever change that. I’m getting excited as I plan your party and scheme of ways to celebrate incredible little you. Get ready, Hanker Tanker. Here comes April!

love you right up to the moon. and back.

mommy